Of course, I miss Derry. I wish I could share this I'm going through right now with him.
Still, I have to wonder if he'd be optimistic about my relationship with Sara. I know, I sound selfish, just bringing Sara up. You know, would things have turned out this way with Sara, if Derry was still here. Would my life continue to be so mundane with him, playing video games? Just letting life pass us by.
Yet, did I really know Derry at all? Was I his only friend? Did I really matter to him, even? Was I the worse friend in the world? Because I didn't know him like I thought I did?
Still, I wanted him to find someone who was going to make his life better. But was there anybody out there, who could have done that? When I think of my own, I don't want to think Sara is the only one I can count on. In the end, it is yourself that has to make you happy.
I never really thought if Derry was happy or not. Yeah, he was full of all sorts of conspiracies. He could have belonged to the NRA, the KKK and who knows what else. But for the most part, he stayed at home. I don't even think he had a job. There was so much I didn't know about him.
But he was my friend. We hung out. We played video games. It might have been lame, but I don't want to forget him.
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